Thursday, January 16, 2014

The Hobbit: Desolation Indeed

You know, there's almost nothing worth saying about this little flick. It's passed the point where it can even be called an adaptation. I could go on endlessly about its varied heinous sins, but I'm sure plenty of Tolkien fans have already littered the internet with ineffective pleas to Peter Jackson for some shred of sanity. I'd just like to point out the common root of the movie's problems, and that's marketing.

No, not marketing of this product itself, but the purpose of this movie as no more than a marketing vehicle. It is not meant to be good, or even to appeal, in itself. It's meant to power various Hollywood stars' careers (the actors who play Kili and the elf bimbo must have some amazing agents) and sell affiliated merchandise. When you see the endless chase scenes on barrels and through spider webs and along catwalks inside Erebor, you have to realize they don't look like a Sonic the Hedgehog game for nothing. Most of the movie is entirely composed of video game sequences, which I'm sure will appear in whatever Super Mario copycat the parent companies want to push on the market. The movie's made to feel like a video game so you can feel more like you're a movie star while playing the game. Because it's all about YOU dear viewer. You're speshul.

Granted, merchandising campaigns are nothing new and a film's pandering value in affiliated fields has been a major factor in securing funding for decades, but there's still a line to be crossed between taking advantage of a film product to sell other merchandise, and specifically fabricating a moving picture as a vehicle for other movies or industries.

The name of that line is Pokemon, not Tolkien.

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